Vaginal Plastic SurgeryI was recently reading about women who undertake labiaplasty in the quest for a designer vagina. This 'designer vagina' is what they imagine to be a 'pretty' version of a vagina, which it seems to have been decided, is a vagina where nothing 'sticks out'.
When I was 10 I was having a bath with my best friend when she pointed at my vagina and said: 'why is there something sticking out?'
I had a look. 'I don't know!' I said, and had a look at hers. Hmmm, nothing seemed to stick out of hers. This was puzzling. I felt instantly embarrassed and ashamed. Why was I different?
I stopped bathing with my friend and, as puberty progressed, the 'something sticking out' got bigger and bigger. It worried me, but I didn't know what it was or what to do about it.
When I was 11 I was lying in the bath with my legs splayed out when my mother walked in without knocking. 'Gosh Love, I think you should lie the other way around, nobody wants to see' she said.
'Is there something wrong with me?' I asked. 'Why is there stuff sticking out?'
I could see that it cost my mother some effort to look. Instantly I felt a surge of shame. There must be something disgusting about me.
'Well, it is very....PRONOUNCED' she said, 'but I'm sure the outside will grow and catch up and then it will stop sticking out.
As she left the bathroom, I looked at myself in horror. Something was dreadfully wrong with me. She hadn't said it was normal. She had admitted that it was PRONOUNCED! I had seen the embarrassment and slight disgust on her face as she looked at me.
As the years passed the rest did grow and catch up a little, but not all the way. There would always be 'something sticking out.' Through my teens and early twenties, I assumed I had 'an ugly one' and never shaved or trimmed my pubic hair, other than the essential bikini line. I thought that the more covered up I was the better. Even though I was well aware that men liked me just fine, I lacked confidence in nudity and always wondered when I was with a new partner if they would think something negative about me.
In hindsight I know that my mother would have been vaguely disgusted to look at ANYONE'S vagina, perhaps even her own. She had been brought up a strict catholic and told to throw powder on the surface of her bath water to save herself from the 'sin' of looking at her own body. But of course, I imagined that it must be because I was so disgusting.
All Shapes And Sizes
It was only through seeing adult movies and the more explicit men's magazines that I began to realise that everyone was different. Some had nothing sticking out, some had a bit, and others had a whole lot more! When I considered the many different shapes and sizes of penises I had come across, big ones, small ones, short fat ones, long thin ones, curved ones, pink ones, purple ones, I realised that there was no set standard that they all conformed to. Why wouldn't it be the same with women?
Labiaplasty for Uniformity
When I heard about the designer vagina craze with women undergoing cosmetic vagina modification surgery in order to conform to a specific ideal, I decided to do some research. What I found surprised me. Far from being unusual, large labia minora occurs in about 36% of women and, just like comparing big breasts to small, the majority of men do not have a preference. However, where they DO state a preference it is usually FOR larger lipped women.
So where did women get the idea that there is a certain way that a vagina is supposed to look? Why is labiaplasty such a popular procedure? Where did the ideal of the designer vagina come from?
Playboy and the 'Pretty' Vagina
Playboy magazine is not a porn magazine; it is a booby magazine. It remains mainstream through its use of very discreet genital detail. In order for it to show genital detail very discreetly, it specifically chooses models that have very small tucked in labia minora for its regular edition magazine. If a woman has large inner labia she will be shown in a pose where this is hidden.
Since Playboy is so widely read and accessible women around the world have concluded that this image is what men want, and that this is what they should be conforming to. This is not the case. The only reason Playboy does not show protruding labia minora is because it is deemed TOO EXPLICIT! Not unsexy! If anything, it is TOO SEXY.
Penthouse on the other hand, which considers itself a hard-core magazine, shows protruding inner labia ALL THE TIME! And Playboy, in its special edition, does too.
Desperate for Labiaplasty
While doing research for this article I found numerous message boards with young girls saying how much they hate themselves and how desperate they are for labiaplasty surgery to make them look normal! I also found well-meaning replies from women with the same 'problem' telling the girls not to worry, if a man loves you, he will accept you 'as you are'. Well there is something very wrong with this advice, as it assumes that there is SOMETHING TO ACCEPT! Something to tolerate! This is not the case! There is NOTHING wrong with you. You are PERFECT as you are!
Surgeons offering labiaplasty downplay the severity of labiaplasty surgery. However, this is serious stuff, requiring a multitude of drugs both during and after surgery, and a minimum of eight weeks of recovery time. EIGHT WEEKS where you cannot wear fitted underwear or tight clothes and cannot do vigorous exercise or have sex! You are also on addictive painkillers such as Vicodin! This is a massive trauma for the body. And as everyone knows, or should know, surgeries DO go wrong. This is not a part of your body you should ever be taking any chances with!
I have also read stories of women who underwent labiaplasty surgery because they had such large labia minora that it caused them pain and discomfort, and they were unable to even wear tight pants. This is a completely different issue, and just as with someone having a breast reduction surgery so that they can enjoy sports and become free from back and shoulder pain, I am fully supportive. The issue I am referring to here is women who are having labiaplasty surgery for purely cosmetic purposes, as they believe they are flawed the way they are.
I don't believe you should simply accept yourself the way you are, I believe you need to LOVE yourself the way you are. And to do this, you must take action! Start thinking about your body in positive affirmations. Say things like 'I have a beautiful vagina' or 'I love my vagina'. You can use any cutesy name you tend to call your vagina, whatever works for you. Say this to yourself dozens of times a day and continue to do so until you start to believe it. Along with your affirmations, start behaving as if you love it! Get a full bikini wax, or shave and trim your pubic hair into whatever style appeals to you, you can even get clip-on vaginal jewelery! Get proud of yourself. If you do have a partner who has tended to see things through the lens of Playboy conditioning, then tell him to get with the program or you might have to get with someone a lot more appreciative!
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Alison_H_Andrews
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